When I sat down at my computer today I had no intention of writing anything. For a couple of weeks now I've been hating life and really not caring about much of anything. Of course there were moments, here and there, when I had some form of normalcy but they were few and far between. When I got up today nothing was any different...my life has not changed from yesterday...or the day before...or the day before...or.......
Then it finally hit me. I can't change anything, only GOD can. Of course I didn't come to this conclusion until late afternoon...when one more day was almost gone. One thing that really affected me was some of the testimonies I heard at church today. God had done so many things for people. One lady will be reunited with her sons after years of not seeing them. These kinds of stories make you think about how well GOD really takes care of us and how much HE loves us. In the long run nothing else really matters. It's amazing how sometimes we let circumstances that are beyond our control...control us. It's also amazing how as soon as I decided to just give it up and let GOD have control of my situations I immediately felt better. The feeling of hopelessness was gone as well as the feeling of, what I will call, rebellion that had started to move in.
In past posts I told how GOD had me change my focus to be about growth, and since then, what a hard time I have had with it. I have found that I don't react the way I should to at least 50% of things that happen. I am faced with the reality today that GOD is teaching me to let go and give HIM control of my life. I am also faced with the fact that I don't always like it much. What I don't like more is the feeling of separation I get when I let things build up to the point of feeling hopeless and that I don't care anymore. We need to be really careful how we let the circumstances of our lives affect our relationship with GOD. HE is the one constant in our lives that we can always count and rely on. I remember what it was like to not have GOD in my life...I don't like it when I start to feel that way again.
I like Psalm 139. It tells what GOD knows about us and how we can't escape from GOD. The last two verses are asking GOD to search our heart, our thoughts, and if there's anything there that shouldn't be, to let us know so we can make it right. We probably won't always like what HE tells us.
Psalm 139: 1-10 and 23-24
1 O Lord, you have examined my heart
and know everything about me.
2 You know when I sit down or stand up.
You know my thoughts even when I’m far away.
3 You see me when I travel
and when I rest at home.
You know everything I do.
4 You know what I am going to say
even before I say it, Lord.
5 You go before me and follow me.
You place your hand of blessing on my head.
6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
too great for me to understand!
7 I can never escape from your Spirit!
I can never get away from your presence!
8 If I go up to heaven, you are there;
if I go down to the grave, you are there.
9 If I ride the wings of the morning,
if I dwell by the farthest oceans,
10 even there your hand will guide me,
and your strength will support me.
23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
24 Point out anything in me that offends you,
and lead me along the path of everlasting life.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Thursday, August 27, 2009
MATTHEW 11:28-30
The road of life can be pretty rough and rugged at times. Lately you might find yourself thinking...If I can just get through what's happening right now everything will be good. Then before you know it, something else hits before you even get through the current situation. Maybe it seems that you are stuck in a cycle of your life that no matter what you do things just seem to be getting worse instead of better. Everybody goes through those times. If you live on this earth you won't be exempt. When things we don't understand start happening in our lives some of us tend to get anxious, tired, grumpy and at times...even angry. It seems like the weight of the world is on your shoulders. Kind of like those old pictures you used to see in the Greek mythology books of Atlas. He always had a picture of the world sitting on his shoulders. He must have been one tired guy!
Well...there is a solution for this when it happens to you. You need to start talking to GOD and reading HIS word. From experience I can tell you that it doesn't always "seem" to start getting better as soon as you do that. In fact, when I let it go as far as the example above, nothing seems to be an easy fix for me. The thing is...you have to start somewhere to get back to where you need to be. If you're a Christian the best place to start is to at least try to read the WORD and talk to GOD. It might be hard at first but it will get easier again. Do whatever you need to do to get things back in order. Just make sure those things include GOD. Don't just rely on yourself.
There is a good scripture I found "again" when I read an e-mail.
Matthew 11:28-30 (New Living Translation)
28 Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”
We don't always have control over what happens to us but we do have control over how we handle tough times. I think that the biggest thing we need to remember is...who is in charge of those times if you are a Christian. Thankfully, it's not you and it's not me. GOD is in charge of our lives. Unlike Atlas...who carried the world on his shoulders...our LORD holds us in HIS HANDS.
Well...there is a solution for this when it happens to you. You need to start talking to GOD and reading HIS word. From experience I can tell you that it doesn't always "seem" to start getting better as soon as you do that. In fact, when I let it go as far as the example above, nothing seems to be an easy fix for me. The thing is...you have to start somewhere to get back to where you need to be. If you're a Christian the best place to start is to at least try to read the WORD and talk to GOD. It might be hard at first but it will get easier again. Do whatever you need to do to get things back in order. Just make sure those things include GOD. Don't just rely on yourself.
There is a good scripture I found "again" when I read an e-mail.
Matthew 11:28-30 (New Living Translation)
28 Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”
We don't always have control over what happens to us but we do have control over how we handle tough times. I think that the biggest thing we need to remember is...who is in charge of those times if you are a Christian. Thankfully, it's not you and it's not me. GOD is in charge of our lives. Unlike Atlas...who carried the world on his shoulders...our LORD holds us in HIS HANDS.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
PEACE FOR YOUR MIND
Where would you look
for what you can't find
What do you need
is it Peace for your mind
With your head in your hands
you look high and low
Where do you search
only Heaven knows
What will you find
in the back of your head
Will you still be looking
when you are dead
Where is the calm
you once thought you had
When did you lose it
bet you got mad
Why did it leave you
and chaos come in
Will you get it back
be free once again
When? Is the question
you keep asking yourself
Will it be the same
or are you full of doubts
We have but one hope
to get peace back and win
Will you ask Jesus
to come back within
When you do that
your mind will be calm
What you will find
is a Peace that is strong
for what you can't find
What do you need
is it Peace for your mind
With your head in your hands
you look high and low
Where do you search
only Heaven knows
What will you find
in the back of your head
Will you still be looking
when you are dead
Where is the calm
you once thought you had
When did you lose it
bet you got mad
Why did it leave you
and chaos come in
Will you get it back
be free once again
When? Is the question
you keep asking yourself
Will it be the same
or are you full of doubts
We have but one hope
to get peace back and win
Will you ask Jesus
to come back within
When you do that
your mind will be calm
What you will find
is a Peace that is strong
Thursday, August 20, 2009
ISAIAH 40:29
Lately there seems to be a pattern developing in my life...a pattern for "Growth Opportunities". Situations for growth were probably always there and I just wasn't as aware of them as I am now. One thing I am finding hard about this is that I don't usually realize the situation is an opportunity until "way" after the fact. Then there are other times when I do and for one reason or another I just plain don't care. Take the last two days for example...
There have been some issues at work that have added to my already stressful job. Since they involved me I was told about them but was also told not to worry about it. Well, because of the nature of the issue I became instantly "irritated". Within about an hour I went from irritated to agitated to really mad. That makes for one long day. When I got up this morning I was feeling better about the whole thing but as soon as I got to work the bad attitude came back. I did pray about it a couple of times but more half hearted than not. Really I would have liked to have seen fire rain down upon a couple of people. I was sure that would make me feel better. But...God didn't cooperate with me on that. Instead, He sent one of my friends over with a CD for me to listen to. Admittedly, it helped some.
The whole purpose of writing this is to say...for quite some time there was no growth happening in this problem. But, when I got home today I read a devotional that said no matter what the problem we need to keep standing, keep believing, and...what stood out most to me...keep doing the right thing. When you do that you are opening yourself up to God's supernatural strength. When you do these things that's when you know you are growing in Him. This is the scripture used in that devotional;
"He gives power to the faint and weary, and to him who has no might He increases strength [causing it to multiply and making it to abound]"
(Isaiah 40:29, AMP)
I knew yesterday that I wasn't reacting in the right way or doing the right things. It was one of those times I really didn't want to. I have been failing at how I know God wants me to act and how I know I should handle these things when they happen. I should have prayed about it and went on as though nothing had ever happened. That's a hard thing to do. When you know God is telling you to handle things in a different manner you need to pay attention and change. The best way to do that is to talk to God about it and ask for His help. When you realize you have been wrong ask for forgiveness and for Him to take care of the situation. Then get on with life and learn and grow through the problem.
There have been some issues at work that have added to my already stressful job. Since they involved me I was told about them but was also told not to worry about it. Well, because of the nature of the issue I became instantly "irritated". Within about an hour I went from irritated to agitated to really mad. That makes for one long day. When I got up this morning I was feeling better about the whole thing but as soon as I got to work the bad attitude came back. I did pray about it a couple of times but more half hearted than not. Really I would have liked to have seen fire rain down upon a couple of people. I was sure that would make me feel better. But...God didn't cooperate with me on that. Instead, He sent one of my friends over with a CD for me to listen to. Admittedly, it helped some.
The whole purpose of writing this is to say...for quite some time there was no growth happening in this problem. But, when I got home today I read a devotional that said no matter what the problem we need to keep standing, keep believing, and...what stood out most to me...keep doing the right thing. When you do that you are opening yourself up to God's supernatural strength. When you do these things that's when you know you are growing in Him. This is the scripture used in that devotional;
"He gives power to the faint and weary, and to him who has no might He increases strength [causing it to multiply and making it to abound]"
(Isaiah 40:29, AMP)
I knew yesterday that I wasn't reacting in the right way or doing the right things. It was one of those times I really didn't want to. I have been failing at how I know God wants me to act and how I know I should handle these things when they happen. I should have prayed about it and went on as though nothing had ever happened. That's a hard thing to do. When you know God is telling you to handle things in a different manner you need to pay attention and change. The best way to do that is to talk to God about it and ask for His help. When you realize you have been wrong ask for forgiveness and for Him to take care of the situation. Then get on with life and learn and grow through the problem.
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
HAVE YOU MET THE SAVIOR
Have you met the precious Savior
the crucified Son
He bled and He died
on a cross made for one
Have you been bought by the blood
of the Savior divine
He's got peace in abundance
to heal your heart and mind
Have you let Him cleanse your soul
and touch you deep within
He'll give you joy everlasting
somehow it won't ever end
Have you found grace and mercy
did He impart it to you
Will you ask Him right now
to make you brand new
Have your sins been forgiven
do you know Him today
He's waiting for you now
please don't turn Him away
Have you been set free
do you know it to be true
Your chains will fall off
He will do that for you
Have you got what it takes
to ask Him today
To come into your life
wash your sins away
He bled and He died
don't scoff at Him now
He loves you so much
to Him you need to bow
the crucified Son
He bled and He died
on a cross made for one
Have you been bought by the blood
of the Savior divine
He's got peace in abundance
to heal your heart and mind
Have you let Him cleanse your soul
and touch you deep within
He'll give you joy everlasting
somehow it won't ever end
Have you found grace and mercy
did He impart it to you
Will you ask Him right now
to make you brand new
Have your sins been forgiven
do you know Him today
He's waiting for you now
please don't turn Him away
Have you been set free
do you know it to be true
Your chains will fall off
He will do that for you
Have you got what it takes
to ask Him today
To come into your life
wash your sins away
He bled and He died
don't scoff at Him now
He loves you so much
to Him you need to bow
Sunday, August 16, 2009
MATTHEW 5:48
Lately I have been trying to figure out what God's purpose is for me. It's really easy to know if I just think about everything that has been happening lately. First He changed what I am to write about in this blog. Then the things I've been reading in the Bible, and other books, all have to do with what it is. God's purpose is to shape me, and everyone else, into His image. I just have to be willing to let Him do that. There is a verse in the Bible that I really didn't know what it meant until this weekend.
Matthew 5:48 (New Living Translation)
But you are to be perfect, even as your Father in heaven is perfect.
I always thought perfect meant; without defect or blemish. Then there's my definition...stop being a screw up. Get it right and stop failing. Conquer the things that you consistently fail at. Those types of definitions. Really I knew that I could never be perfect but I could certainly give it a shot. Then I read the true meaning of this verse. I looked it up in a few places so I could be sure that what I was reading was right.
Matthew 5:48 (Amplified Bible)
You, therefore, must be perfect [growing into complete maturity of godliness in mind and character, having reached the proper height of virtue and integrity], as your heavenly Father is perfect.
The Greek meaning of the word "perfect" is...mature and finished.
Even though becoming "mature and finished" is a slow process, it is certainly more attainable than "being without defect". To achieve the kind of perfection talked about in Matthew 5:48 all you have to do is surrender your whole life...will, being, mind, heart...to the Lord. To be honest, that isn't always so easy either. I can be pretty stubborn about things. But, if I will do that kind of surrendering Jesus will change me.
This past week I had an opportunity to "sign up" for a lesson in change, or maturity, which is what this blog is really all about. I was asked to do something this weekend that I really didn't want to do. But, I agreed to do it. I'll be honest, I complained a few times about it. I was going to have to put aside my own wants and do something to help someone else. Normally that's not a problem for me, this time it was. Knowing that I had the completely wrong attitude, I asked the Lord to help me to feel differently about it. It was amazing. I actually had a good time doing it. And, for the first time in my life, I was actually able to "talk" to about 15 people without shaking and losing my thoughts.
I still have a long ways to go on this "road to maturity" but it's just one step at a time. God is amazing. He will help you if you ask Him and your serious about
Matthew 5:48 (New Living Translation)
But you are to be perfect, even as your Father in heaven is perfect.
I always thought perfect meant; without defect or blemish. Then there's my definition...stop being a screw up. Get it right and stop failing. Conquer the things that you consistently fail at. Those types of definitions. Really I knew that I could never be perfect but I could certainly give it a shot. Then I read the true meaning of this verse. I looked it up in a few places so I could be sure that what I was reading was right.
Matthew 5:48 (Amplified Bible)
You, therefore, must be perfect [growing into complete maturity of godliness in mind and character, having reached the proper height of virtue and integrity], as your heavenly Father is perfect.
The Greek meaning of the word "perfect" is...mature and finished.
Even though becoming "mature and finished" is a slow process, it is certainly more attainable than "being without defect". To achieve the kind of perfection talked about in Matthew 5:48 all you have to do is surrender your whole life...will, being, mind, heart...to the Lord. To be honest, that isn't always so easy either. I can be pretty stubborn about things. But, if I will do that kind of surrendering Jesus will change me.
This past week I had an opportunity to "sign up" for a lesson in change, or maturity, which is what this blog is really all about. I was asked to do something this weekend that I really didn't want to do. But, I agreed to do it. I'll be honest, I complained a few times about it. I was going to have to put aside my own wants and do something to help someone else. Normally that's not a problem for me, this time it was. Knowing that I had the completely wrong attitude, I asked the Lord to help me to feel differently about it. It was amazing. I actually had a good time doing it. And, for the first time in my life, I was actually able to "talk" to about 15 people without shaking and losing my thoughts.
I still have a long ways to go on this "road to maturity" but it's just one step at a time. God is amazing. He will help you if you ask Him and your serious about
Saturday, August 15, 2009
JOHN 17:17
What a beautiful day. I took my dog for a walk this morning and looking around at all the beauty I couldn't help but think of God. He made all of this for us. The hills and mountains. The trees with all the birds in them singing. The beautiful blue sky and the sun coming up. Every blade of green grass...even all the bees and bugs crawling around in them. They all have a purpose, just like we do.
I have come to believe that we never find our real purpose in life until we find the Lord as our Savior and turn our lives completely over to Him. Sometimes that's a hard thing to do...letting go completely. We all like to have control of our destinies. But...I have been realizing lately that if I let go He makes a lot better choices for me than I do. I believe that my life would have a lot less conflict and anxiety in it if I just let go of it. What do they say...Let go and let God. That could be for everything in your life. He is the Master Planner and He has a great plan for all of us. Like I keep saying...More and More of HIM and Less and Less of me. I think for that to happen, and to find my real purpose, I need to commit to a better prayer life.
Of course there is also reading the Bible. To grow and mature you have to pursue Holiness...which is to become more like Christ. To become more like Him you have to read His Word and let Him speak to you through it. That builds your relationship with Him. Without a relationship with Him you can't become more like Him.
John 17:17 (New King James Version)
Sanctify them by Your truth. Your word is truth.
I read a quote recently by Nancy DeMoss that said; "Your progress in holiness will never exceed your relationship with the Word of God."
When we read the Word, and live by what it says, it has the power to transform our minds. When that starts to happen we allow God to work in and change us the way we need to be changed. This all leads to growth.
Proverbs 3:6 (King James Version)
In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
I have come to believe that we never find our real purpose in life until we find the Lord as our Savior and turn our lives completely over to Him. Sometimes that's a hard thing to do...letting go completely. We all like to have control of our destinies. But...I have been realizing lately that if I let go He makes a lot better choices for me than I do. I believe that my life would have a lot less conflict and anxiety in it if I just let go of it. What do they say...Let go and let God. That could be for everything in your life. He is the Master Planner and He has a great plan for all of us. Like I keep saying...More and More of HIM and Less and Less of me. I think for that to happen, and to find my real purpose, I need to commit to a better prayer life.
Of course there is also reading the Bible. To grow and mature you have to pursue Holiness...which is to become more like Christ. To become more like Him you have to read His Word and let Him speak to you through it. That builds your relationship with Him. Without a relationship with Him you can't become more like Him.
John 17:17 (New King James Version)
Sanctify them by Your truth. Your word is truth.
I read a quote recently by Nancy DeMoss that said; "Your progress in holiness will never exceed your relationship with the Word of God."
When we read the Word, and live by what it says, it has the power to transform our minds. When that starts to happen we allow God to work in and change us the way we need to be changed. This all leads to growth.
Proverbs 3:6 (King James Version)
In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.
Friday, August 14, 2009
HIS GLORIOUS BRIDE
What's the sweetest thing you know
The love of Jesus that He bestowed
Upon your heart where He wrote one day
I love you child with Me you'll stay
One day you'll live in Heaven above
Sing praises of worship and adoring love
To the One who gave His life for you
Who died on the cross so you could make it through
He's waiting there now in your new home
He'll be coming to get you and make you His own
He's up there watching you with pride
Soon you will be His glorious bride
The love of Jesus that He bestowed
Upon your heart where He wrote one day
I love you child with Me you'll stay
One day you'll live in Heaven above
Sing praises of worship and adoring love
To the One who gave His life for you
Who died on the cross so you could make it through
He's waiting there now in your new home
He'll be coming to get you and make you His own
He's up there watching you with pride
Soon you will be His glorious bride
Thursday, August 13, 2009
CALLED TO CHANGE
John 3:30 (New Living Translation)
30 He must become greater and greater, and I must become less and less.
I have used this verse in two of my last posts and I will probably have it in more to come. I can't seem to get away from it. It's what I want to happen and what I feel the Lord is telling me. He wants to become the center of my life...my focus. He wants to be the most important ONE...the One I rely on for my life.
God is calling me to be different than I have ever been before. To do different things. If someone asks me to do something for God I need to just do it and not think about how it will affect me. God is telling me to have a level of faith that says...with God's help I can do it. Even if within myself everything is screaming...You can't do it...do it anyway. He's asking me, Who do you put your trust in? Is it in yourself or is it in ME? Well, I like to think that my trust is totally in Him but in reality I know that many times I rely on myself and not Him. It's kind of like walking down the center of the road. Your on a line and you have to look straight ahead. Jesus is up ahead of you guiding your way. He's right in the middle of the line. As long as you keep your eyes on Him you'll make it. Don't look off to the right or the left even for a moment. There's nothing but lots of noise and possible wrecks on either side. If we just keep going down the middle, following Jesus, whatever He asks of us we can do. He will keep us through anything and everything. Sometimes He asks us to get out of our comfort zone to stretch us so we can have a fuller life in Him.
No matter what you do...do it for the Lord. Make Him your main focus. Let people see that He is the one you live for, not for yourself. The Message Bible says it this way...
John 3:30 (The Message)
This is the assigned moment for him to move into the center, while I slip off to the sidelines.
That's some of the things He's been speaking about to me. Could that be some of the barriers He wants to get rid of in my life? It's kind of a sobering thought but it may be. Am I ready? Right now that's the million dollar question!
30 He must become greater and greater, and I must become less and less.
I have used this verse in two of my last posts and I will probably have it in more to come. I can't seem to get away from it. It's what I want to happen and what I feel the Lord is telling me. He wants to become the center of my life...my focus. He wants to be the most important ONE...the One I rely on for my life.
God is calling me to be different than I have ever been before. To do different things. If someone asks me to do something for God I need to just do it and not think about how it will affect me. God is telling me to have a level of faith that says...with God's help I can do it. Even if within myself everything is screaming...You can't do it...do it anyway. He's asking me, Who do you put your trust in? Is it in yourself or is it in ME? Well, I like to think that my trust is totally in Him but in reality I know that many times I rely on myself and not Him. It's kind of like walking down the center of the road. Your on a line and you have to look straight ahead. Jesus is up ahead of you guiding your way. He's right in the middle of the line. As long as you keep your eyes on Him you'll make it. Don't look off to the right or the left even for a moment. There's nothing but lots of noise and possible wrecks on either side. If we just keep going down the middle, following Jesus, whatever He asks of us we can do. He will keep us through anything and everything. Sometimes He asks us to get out of our comfort zone to stretch us so we can have a fuller life in Him.
No matter what you do...do it for the Lord. Make Him your main focus. Let people see that He is the one you live for, not for yourself. The Message Bible says it this way...
John 3:30 (The Message)
This is the assigned moment for him to move into the center, while I slip off to the sidelines.
That's some of the things He's been speaking about to me. Could that be some of the barriers He wants to get rid of in my life? It's kind of a sobering thought but it may be. Am I ready? Right now that's the million dollar question!
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
JOHN 3:30
Does God ever just drop words into your head? He does that to me when I least expect it. Sometimes I'm in the shower, sometimes in the midst of problems I'm trying to solve at work, and sometimes when I'm first waking up. In my past life, and even after I was a Christian, I would hear other Christians say that God spoke to them or gave them words and I would think...How do you know it was Him??! Well, I know because it's just a different kind of a thought. It feels different and I just know. The first few times it happened I was like...Whoa, what was that? I'm getting more used to it now but it still usually surprises me.Anyway...
...it happened again this morning when I was driving to work. I was talking to Him about "stuff" and the word accountability came to mind. Immediately I think, What does that mean? Then I actually said, What does that mean? Immediately I knew...my blog. Why does "maturity" and "pursuing God" have to be what I mainly write about now?...that has been the question I have been thinking about recently. I'm not sure I have actually said it out loud but, as we all know, God even knows our thoughts. So...He took the opportunity to tell me. I begin to think about it and I know that it is hard for me to write about these things. Then the thoughts begin to pour into my mind more rapidly. The just of it is...if you obey me and write about what I tell you too, it will be easier for you to live like you should. Whether it be in your thoughts, your actions or just your day to day living...you will be more aware of me.
God is concerned about things we want to know. Even when we don't "really" ask Him the question. My lesson for the day, I think.
John 3:30 He must become greater; I must become less.
...it happened again this morning when I was driving to work. I was talking to Him about "stuff" and the word accountability came to mind. Immediately I think, What does that mean? Then I actually said, What does that mean? Immediately I knew...my blog. Why does "maturity" and "pursuing God" have to be what I mainly write about now?...that has been the question I have been thinking about recently. I'm not sure I have actually said it out loud but, as we all know, God even knows our thoughts. So...He took the opportunity to tell me. I begin to think about it and I know that it is hard for me to write about these things. Then the thoughts begin to pour into my mind more rapidly. The just of it is...if you obey me and write about what I tell you too, it will be easier for you to live like you should. Whether it be in your thoughts, your actions or just your day to day living...you will be more aware of me.
God is concerned about things we want to know. Even when we don't "really" ask Him the question. My lesson for the day, I think.
John 3:30 He must become greater; I must become less.
Monday, August 10, 2009
TESTIMONY; THANK YOU JESUS
Today I have decided to give my testimony. I'm not really sure how to write it out but with God's help, here it is...
August 10, 2009...just a normal day for most people. For me it's been a different kind of day. Two years ago today I started on a journey that has changed my life. I met someone that day that is incredible. His name is JESUS CHRIST and He has completely turned my life around. Starting at about 4:30 this morning I have thought a lot about the last two years. Where I was then and where I am now. I was a total mess back then. All of my life I had hidden things from everyone...things that happened to me, the way I felt, things I had done...no one really knew me. Not even the people I was closest to. I was depressed, thinking about killing myself, drinking...basically unhappy and trying to figure out a way to get out of all of it. For a lot of my life I had been that way. I didn't know it then, but the one person I didn't think cared at all about me was actually pursuing me. For about 1 1/2 weeks prior to me becoming a Christian, GOD was working in my life. Probably even before that but I didn't know it. Different things would pop up on my computer about God, people would say things to me, all kinds of crazy things happened. Then about 3 days before I gave in I met a person from Georgia on Yahoo chat. I got a message that said she was asking if I wanted to accept her as a friend. I thought...why not? So I answered back and after we got to talking she said she had not sent that message. Through conversation it came about that she was a Christian and she asked if I was. I finally told her no and that was the beginning of the end of my life of torment. For three nights she "harassed" me, on the computer, about God. On the last night God put someone's name in my head that I kind of knew. All night long, and part of the next day, all I could think was that I had to call that person and talk to them about God. For most of that time I thought, "No Way" would I do that. Let me tell you...GOD is relentless. Once the Holy Spirit started really working on me, He wouldn't let up. I was totally miserable. Today I thank God for that...then, I didn't know what I was going to do. Through a series of events that day, I finally called, met and talked with them. They prayed with me and I really didn't feel anything. After awhile, and more talking, things in my head did start to change. Accepting Jesus as my Savior didn't instantly solve all my problems. Actually, there were many really bad days. At times it seemed like I would take 2 steps forward and then 3 or 4 steps back. Sometimes I just wanted to quit. "BUT GOD"...I like that phrase...wouldn't let me! He put Christian people in my life that I could trust and talk to. Before I even became a Christian He put me in a good church. I have to say it again...JESUS has changed my life! I am not depressed anymore, suicide doesn't enter my thoughts. At times I am still tempted to drink but I can't even remember when the last time was that I did, and...I have a much more happy, positive attitude than I ever had.
You can read my whole blog if you want to know more of my story. It talks a lot about my younger days. There are also things in it that have happened since I became a Christian. Forgiving me of my sins was the biggest and best miracle He could ever do for me. He has done other miracles since and they are there to read also. This blog is about my life but it in no way is meant to promote me or the things of my past. This blog is to show the saving power of Jesus Christ and all the things He has done for me and to let you know that He can do that and much more for you. If you are willing, HE is able!
If you don't know Him as your Savior you can today. Ask him to come into your life and forgive you of your sins. Then live for HIM. Find someone to talk to about God. HE can help you.
Jesus is the answer for all your problems.
Philippians 4:8-9 (New Living Translation)
8 And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. 9 Keep putting into practice all you learned and received from me—everything you heard from me and saw me doing. Then the God of peace will be with you.
Colossians 3:17 (New International Version)
17And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him
August 10, 2009...just a normal day for most people. For me it's been a different kind of day. Two years ago today I started on a journey that has changed my life. I met someone that day that is incredible. His name is JESUS CHRIST and He has completely turned my life around. Starting at about 4:30 this morning I have thought a lot about the last two years. Where I was then and where I am now. I was a total mess back then. All of my life I had hidden things from everyone...things that happened to me, the way I felt, things I had done...no one really knew me. Not even the people I was closest to. I was depressed, thinking about killing myself, drinking...basically unhappy and trying to figure out a way to get out of all of it. For a lot of my life I had been that way. I didn't know it then, but the one person I didn't think cared at all about me was actually pursuing me. For about 1 1/2 weeks prior to me becoming a Christian, GOD was working in my life. Probably even before that but I didn't know it. Different things would pop up on my computer about God, people would say things to me, all kinds of crazy things happened. Then about 3 days before I gave in I met a person from Georgia on Yahoo chat. I got a message that said she was asking if I wanted to accept her as a friend. I thought...why not? So I answered back and after we got to talking she said she had not sent that message. Through conversation it came about that she was a Christian and she asked if I was. I finally told her no and that was the beginning of the end of my life of torment. For three nights she "harassed" me, on the computer, about God. On the last night God put someone's name in my head that I kind of knew. All night long, and part of the next day, all I could think was that I had to call that person and talk to them about God. For most of that time I thought, "No Way" would I do that. Let me tell you...GOD is relentless. Once the Holy Spirit started really working on me, He wouldn't let up. I was totally miserable. Today I thank God for that...then, I didn't know what I was going to do. Through a series of events that day, I finally called, met and talked with them. They prayed with me and I really didn't feel anything. After awhile, and more talking, things in my head did start to change. Accepting Jesus as my Savior didn't instantly solve all my problems. Actually, there were many really bad days. At times it seemed like I would take 2 steps forward and then 3 or 4 steps back. Sometimes I just wanted to quit. "BUT GOD"...I like that phrase...wouldn't let me! He put Christian people in my life that I could trust and talk to. Before I even became a Christian He put me in a good church. I have to say it again...JESUS has changed my life! I am not depressed anymore, suicide doesn't enter my thoughts. At times I am still tempted to drink but I can't even remember when the last time was that I did, and...I have a much more happy, positive attitude than I ever had.
You can read my whole blog if you want to know more of my story. It talks a lot about my younger days. There are also things in it that have happened since I became a Christian. Forgiving me of my sins was the biggest and best miracle He could ever do for me. He has done other miracles since and they are there to read also. This blog is about my life but it in no way is meant to promote me or the things of my past. This blog is to show the saving power of Jesus Christ and all the things He has done for me and to let you know that He can do that and much more for you. If you are willing, HE is able!
If you don't know Him as your Savior you can today. Ask him to come into your life and forgive you of your sins. Then live for HIM. Find someone to talk to about God. HE can help you.
Jesus is the answer for all your problems.
Philippians 4:8-9 (New Living Translation)
8 And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. 9 Keep putting into practice all you learned and received from me—everything you heard from me and saw me doing. Then the God of peace will be with you.
Colossians 3:17 (New International Version)
17And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him
Sunday, August 9, 2009
EPHESIANS 4:22-24
Ephesians 4:22-24 (New Living Translation)
22 throw off your old sinful nature and your former way of life, which is corrupted by lust and deception. 23 Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes. 24 Put on your new nature, created to be like God—truly righteous and holy.
What happens when you become a Christian? You get a new life! God gives you a new life in Him. He takes your old life and replaces it with a new one. He performs a miracle in you. What are you supposed to do because of that? It's kind of like the old saying...Off with the old and On with the new. Let the Lord wash all of those old thoughts out of your mind and replace them with new thoughts...His thoughts. Let Him heal and renew your mind. Then you have to believe that you are different. That you are good enough to do whatever God has called you to do. Then you have to do it. When things get tough, and you have doubts, you pray. You continue to pray until all the doubts and fears are gone. Prayer will get you to God. If you walk away for awhile, prayer will take you back to God. Once you find God you can have peace. Your mind can be at rest even when things are hectic all around you.
I know that to really have effective change in my life I have to pray more. God can't change me if I don't talk to Him and give Him opportunity. God and prayer is the key to everything.
God Is The Key
GOD is the key
to a life gone wrong
GOD is all you need
when you can't seem to hold on
Prayer will touch God
when He seems far away
Prayer is what you do
when you have gone astray
GOD heals your mind
when you can't think anymore
GOD gives you hope
to fight all the more
Prayer will help you find
the quiet that you need
Prayer will help you steady
your soul so you find peace
God is your fortress
where you can go to hide
God is always there
right by your side
Prayer will take you into
the presence of God
Where you will find Him waiting
just listening for your heart
22 throw off your old sinful nature and your former way of life, which is corrupted by lust and deception. 23 Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes. 24 Put on your new nature, created to be like God—truly righteous and holy.
What happens when you become a Christian? You get a new life! God gives you a new life in Him. He takes your old life and replaces it with a new one. He performs a miracle in you. What are you supposed to do because of that? It's kind of like the old saying...Off with the old and On with the new. Let the Lord wash all of those old thoughts out of your mind and replace them with new thoughts...His thoughts. Let Him heal and renew your mind. Then you have to believe that you are different. That you are good enough to do whatever God has called you to do. Then you have to do it. When things get tough, and you have doubts, you pray. You continue to pray until all the doubts and fears are gone. Prayer will get you to God. If you walk away for awhile, prayer will take you back to God. Once you find God you can have peace. Your mind can be at rest even when things are hectic all around you.
I know that to really have effective change in my life I have to pray more. God can't change me if I don't talk to Him and give Him opportunity. God and prayer is the key to everything.
God Is The Key
GOD is the key
to a life gone wrong
GOD is all you need
when you can't seem to hold on
Prayer will touch God
when He seems far away
Prayer is what you do
when you have gone astray
GOD heals your mind
when you can't think anymore
GOD gives you hope
to fight all the more
Prayer will help you find
the quiet that you need
Prayer will help you steady
your soul so you find peace
God is your fortress
where you can go to hide
God is always there
right by your side
Prayer will take you into
the presence of God
Where you will find Him waiting
just listening for your heart
Thursday, August 6, 2009
PHILIPPIANS 3:12-14
It was back in July when I knew for sure that I was to change what I write about in my blog. At that time I thought it was going to be much easier writing about "The road to maturity" than it had been to write mainly about my past. Well...I was wrong. I think I liked that much better. When you have been down a path already, been through the "good times" and lived through the pain, you have experience in it. It's easy because you know it. You might not like it...but you know it. It's familiar to you. During the time I was writing about it there were periods of growth but they were not the main part of the posts. Now, I find it is hard to write about the day to day stuff because it's things I am currently having to learn. One thing I think I have figured out is...because I am writing about some of them, I am more aware when I don't do things exactly as I should. Luckily for me...God does not expect us to be perfect. He knows we are human and will do things wrong. This week was no exception...
There was an event at the beginning of the week that I knew I should go to. I asked four of my friends if they were going to go and all of them, for various reasons, said no. I knew that I should go from the time I had first heard about it. Really, I didn't want to but I felt that God was telling me to go. Well, since my friends weren't going I caved and didn't go either. That was the wrong thing to do. I knew if I said I was going to go that they would give me a hard time about it. That shouldn't have mattered. I should have listened to that "voice" inside of me and went anyway. I will never know what would have happened had I went. Off and on all week I have thought about it. I know I made the wrong choice.
During my bible reading tonight I read Matthew 14. It talks about Herod when he had John the Baptist beheaded. Herod didn't want to do that but because his friends were all there he caved and had him killed anyway. Herod didn't want to be embarrassed in front of his peers. So, why do we let ourselves be intimidated and swayed by our friends? For me it's because I don't want them upset with me or for them to give me a hard time about it. After the fact I always regret my decision.
I think what I'm supposed to learn from this is to listen to God and not other people. Sometimes they say and do things just to get you to conform to their wants. I need to do what God says and not what people say. It seems that He is telling me to take a chance, step out and do whatever He tells me, even if it's on my own. He will always be there with me. If I do that, and keep my eyes on Jesus, He will work it out so everything is alright.
Hopefully the next time I will make the right choice. That's when I'll know for sure if I really learned anything from this or not. I pray I really did.
While listening to the radio I heard this quote that I thought was appropriate;
Growth comes when you invest you heart, mind, and soul into relationship with HIM.
Don't let anything, or anyone, distract you from reaching your goal of knowing Christ more and becoming more like Him. I like these verses in The Message translation;
Philippians 3:12-14 (The Message)
Focused on the Goal
12-14I'm not saying that I have this all together, that I have it made. But I am well on my way, reaching out for Christ, who has so wondrously reached out for me. Friends, don't get me wrong: By no means do I count myself an expert in all of this, but I've got my eye on the goal, where God is beckoning us onward—to Jesus. I'm off and running, and I'm not turning back.
I think that pretty much says it for me. I may stumble and occasionally may fall, but...with the help of the LORD, I won't turn back.
There was an event at the beginning of the week that I knew I should go to. I asked four of my friends if they were going to go and all of them, for various reasons, said no. I knew that I should go from the time I had first heard about it. Really, I didn't want to but I felt that God was telling me to go. Well, since my friends weren't going I caved and didn't go either. That was the wrong thing to do. I knew if I said I was going to go that they would give me a hard time about it. That shouldn't have mattered. I should have listened to that "voice" inside of me and went anyway. I will never know what would have happened had I went. Off and on all week I have thought about it. I know I made the wrong choice.
During my bible reading tonight I read Matthew 14. It talks about Herod when he had John the Baptist beheaded. Herod didn't want to do that but because his friends were all there he caved and had him killed anyway. Herod didn't want to be embarrassed in front of his peers. So, why do we let ourselves be intimidated and swayed by our friends? For me it's because I don't want them upset with me or for them to give me a hard time about it. After the fact I always regret my decision.
I think what I'm supposed to learn from this is to listen to God and not other people. Sometimes they say and do things just to get you to conform to their wants. I need to do what God says and not what people say. It seems that He is telling me to take a chance, step out and do whatever He tells me, even if it's on my own. He will always be there with me. If I do that, and keep my eyes on Jesus, He will work it out so everything is alright.
Hopefully the next time I will make the right choice. That's when I'll know for sure if I really learned anything from this or not. I pray I really did.
While listening to the radio I heard this quote that I thought was appropriate;
Growth comes when you invest you heart, mind, and soul into relationship with HIM.
Don't let anything, or anyone, distract you from reaching your goal of knowing Christ more and becoming more like Him. I like these verses in The Message translation;
Philippians 3:12-14 (The Message)
Focused on the Goal
12-14I'm not saying that I have this all together, that I have it made. But I am well on my way, reaching out for Christ, who has so wondrously reached out for me. Friends, don't get me wrong: By no means do I count myself an expert in all of this, but I've got my eye on the goal, where God is beckoning us onward—to Jesus. I'm off and running, and I'm not turning back.
I think that pretty much says it for me. I may stumble and occasionally may fall, but...with the help of the LORD, I won't turn back.
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
2 TIMOTHY 2:15
It's funny how GOD puts thoughts in my mind. I had been doing my Bible reading and had in fact just finished it. I was making notes when He just gave me this scripture.
2 Timothy 2:15 (King James Version)15Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.
I had read in Matthew 9:20-22 about the woman that had so much faith she knew that if she just "touched the hem of his cloak" she would be healed. Sure enough...Jesus told her, "Your faith has healed you."
I just thought how amazing that was. My next thoughts were...God will change me if I am willing to do my part. Have faith and believe what I read. Read and study His word and learn everything I can. Live for Him to the best of my ability. He wants to make Himself known to us. Then the first few words of that verse came to my mind. I didn't know it all, or where it was found, but I know how to use GOOGLE. Then He told me to post it in this blog.
My Bible says about this verse; Consistent and diligent study of God's word is vital; otherwise we will be lulled into neglecting God and our true purpose for living. To handle the word of truth correctly, we must study what the word of God says so we can understand what it means.
I have to be relentless on my journey to really know God. Keep talking to Him and reading His word. He has told me if I do this He will be with me. He will make Himself known to me in a real way.
Writing all of this in a blog for everyone to read is still very different for me. It's sharing my thoughts and the thoughts that God gives to me. But...it's good. God has told me I need to do this. It is all a growth exercise.
Proverbs 3:5-6 (New King James Version)
5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
6 In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths.
2 Timothy 2:15 (King James Version)15Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.
I had read in Matthew 9:20-22 about the woman that had so much faith she knew that if she just "touched the hem of his cloak" she would be healed. Sure enough...Jesus told her, "Your faith has healed you."
I just thought how amazing that was. My next thoughts were...God will change me if I am willing to do my part. Have faith and believe what I read. Read and study His word and learn everything I can. Live for Him to the best of my ability. He wants to make Himself known to us. Then the first few words of that verse came to my mind. I didn't know it all, or where it was found, but I know how to use GOOGLE. Then He told me to post it in this blog.
My Bible says about this verse; Consistent and diligent study of God's word is vital; otherwise we will be lulled into neglecting God and our true purpose for living. To handle the word of truth correctly, we must study what the word of God says so we can understand what it means.
I have to be relentless on my journey to really know God. Keep talking to Him and reading His word. He has told me if I do this He will be with me. He will make Himself known to me in a real way.
Writing all of this in a blog for everyone to read is still very different for me. It's sharing my thoughts and the thoughts that God gives to me. But...it's good. God has told me I need to do this. It is all a growth exercise.
Proverbs 3:5-6 (New King James Version)
5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart,
And lean not on your own understanding;
6 In all your ways acknowledge Him,
And He shall direct your paths.
Monday, August 3, 2009
PRAYER
Prayer is something GOD has been talking to me about for a long time. It's always been something that I have a hard time doing for very long. It seems that GOD is telling me that I need to pray more. HE longs to here from us all the time. That's how we become closer to HIM and HE gets closer to us. If we will call on HIM, HE will answer. When things get hard talk to GOD about it and HE will always be there for you.
PRAYER
Prayer is something
God desires from us all
What will you do
will you answer His call
Do you have it in you
to pray everyday
Or would you rather just stumble
whittle your life away
Prayer is the key
to heal up your mind
How do you do it
one word at a time
GOD just wants to hear from you
keep you close to His side
Do you hear HIM calling
in HIM you'll want to hide
HE'S only as far
as you let HIM get
If you stay in prayer
you'll never regret
Your day's can be hard
night's restless too
Run to the FATHER
HE'S waiting for you
PRAYER
Prayer is something
God desires from us all
What will you do
will you answer His call
Do you have it in you
to pray everyday
Or would you rather just stumble
whittle your life away
Prayer is the key
to heal up your mind
How do you do it
one word at a time
GOD just wants to hear from you
keep you close to His side
Do you hear HIM calling
in HIM you'll want to hide
HE'S only as far
as you let HIM get
If you stay in prayer
you'll never regret
Your day's can be hard
night's restless too
Run to the FATHER
HE'S waiting for you
GOD HAS A PLAN
I told you in my last post that the LORD told me that HE was going to start knocking down barriers...or as you hear preachers say, breaking down walls you have set up around you...in my life. One of the things I have found out is that GOD doesn't lie. If HE says HE is going to do something, HE does. You never know when but you can be sure that HE will. Basically, HE let me know that if I was going to continue to grow that there are some things about me that have to change. That really doesn't come as a surprise to me. So...I have a list in my head of things I know that need to change. The problem is...like it is for most everyone else, change is hard for me. So there's a choice to make. I have to decide what is more important to me. Following GOD and doing whatever it is that HE has for my life, or...staying stuck in all of my old ways with the barriers still up around me. Some days "stuck" is my choice. Other days doing what GOD wants and working on change is my choice. There are times, if you don't make the right choice, GOD takes it right out of your hands. That's what HE did with me on Sunday...
Going to church sometimes is hard for me. I'm not really sure why. Maybe it's because there are lots of people there and you have to interact. Other times I think it's because of an old mind set of...not really "belonging" there. I'm not sure, maybe both reasons. For now GOD has decided to work on the interacting part. Church is an interactive activity, or...relationships. One of my biggest downfalls. The bad thing about it is that I mainly have this problem at church. Because of this I have come to realize it is probably just anther thing that the devil uses to keep me messed up. GOD and I have visited this problem before but I guess I didn't learn very well. There is one thing about GOD...HE keeps taking you back until you get it!! So yesterday at church GOD decided I was getting lots of hugs. SIX of them to be exact. Yes...I counted them after I left. Besides all of the hugs, four or five more people talked to me and asked me if I was doing okay, if everything was alright? Actually, yes...I was doing fine, I wasn't even uncomfortable there.
When all of this was happening I was just thinking how strange it all was. Later on I realized it wasn't strange at all. It was GOD. HE has a plan and I just have to go with it. GOD is working on breaking down the barriers that I have built up over the years. I know that if I am going to become the person GOD wants me to be I have to mature in my walk with HIM. In order to do this I have to go to church and be comfortable there.We need the support of one another.
Hebrews 10:25 (New Living Translation)
25 And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.
When GOD decides HE is going to do things in your life...BE READY. Pray and read HIS WORD a lot and ask HIM to make you more like HIM.
John 3:30 (New Living Translation)
30 He must become greater and greater, and I must become less and less.
Going to church sometimes is hard for me. I'm not really sure why. Maybe it's because there are lots of people there and you have to interact. Other times I think it's because of an old mind set of...not really "belonging" there. I'm not sure, maybe both reasons. For now GOD has decided to work on the interacting part. Church is an interactive activity, or...relationships. One of my biggest downfalls. The bad thing about it is that I mainly have this problem at church. Because of this I have come to realize it is probably just anther thing that the devil uses to keep me messed up. GOD and I have visited this problem before but I guess I didn't learn very well. There is one thing about GOD...HE keeps taking you back until you get it!! So yesterday at church GOD decided I was getting lots of hugs. SIX of them to be exact. Yes...I counted them after I left. Besides all of the hugs, four or five more people talked to me and asked me if I was doing okay, if everything was alright? Actually, yes...I was doing fine, I wasn't even uncomfortable there.
When all of this was happening I was just thinking how strange it all was. Later on I realized it wasn't strange at all. It was GOD. HE has a plan and I just have to go with it. GOD is working on breaking down the barriers that I have built up over the years. I know that if I am going to become the person GOD wants me to be I have to mature in my walk with HIM. In order to do this I have to go to church and be comfortable there.We need the support of one another.
Hebrews 10:25 (New Living Translation)
25 And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.
When GOD decides HE is going to do things in your life...BE READY. Pray and read HIS WORD a lot and ask HIM to make you more like HIM.
John 3:30 (New Living Translation)
30 He must become greater and greater, and I must become less and less.
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